Pain is inevitable, Suffering is a Part of Every Life but !!!!! ...

Misery is Optional.

                                      This is a dearly loved, cherished and a vital paradigm of The Recovery Movement and All 12 Step Programs! Having been involved in such groups as well as therapy on and off through out my life and CONSISTENTLY since the last days of December of 1988.

To my regret and sorrow, I've often gone to such meetings and been a consumer of Metal Health Services in Fairfax County , Virginia and yet still stubbornly and rather pathetically spent too many years telling people how cruel and vicious  people had been to me. I railed loudly against "predators and bullies".

While I'm not at all; fond of people who choose to behave that way and treat others this way, I do, more and more GET that we cannot control others. People are accountable and responsible for their actions. Hopefully Those who violate the law will one day need to answer to the law for their choices. Should they evade this, I believe that There is a SOVEREIGN God who judges impartially, fairly and , ultimately, absolutely justly!


I also know that I am fully responsible and accountable for each and every one of MY choices and actions! I cannot control how others treat me and respond to me. I cannot control how they speak to me and about me to others Yet. I can control how I respond. William Blake taught the idea that , " The Greatest Discovery of ANY generation is that a human being CAN alter his life by altering his attitude." Doctor Viktor Frankl, A Well- Renowned  Psychologist and therapist and a World War TWO Death Camp survivor saw this same matter as follows, " Everything can be taken from a man but one thing : the last of human freedoms  - to CHOOSE one's ATTITUDE in ANY given set of circumstances, to CHOOSE one's way of life."


I spent too many years blaming, deferring, whining, hiding and excusing. I became the locust that ate away my own life. Finally, I chose slowly over the last7 and a fraction years, starting with serving on two teams sent from My Church, Arlington Virginia's Grace Community Church- one- Hurricane Relief in Biloxi, Mississippi and helping to Build a house on a barren mountainside above Tecate, Mexico.

 I lapsed and fell back since those days in 2006 but a seed was planted, a seed that I could not permanently ignore, explain away or, for long or consistently, set aside! God kept telling me, " I made you better than this and better than this. You are ALREADY mine, You already ARE My servant. Yield to me and let me teach, direct and empower you! It will not be easy, comfortable AND WITHOUT PAIN, My Grace is SUFFICIENT to sustain you through all that you MUST do!"


 My life really started to become one that I chose to make more positive and beneficial to others and myself in July of 2011! I decided that I could not stand to be around myself- I wanted to choose to be done with myself. I was directed to humble myself and ask for help and given the ability to listen to God's Sane and Orderly Direction.

 I spent the next few months designing an 18 Month Program- being reminded that TIME TAKES TIME and that a person to become different must allow him or herself to submit toa process of commitment, intent and action that will create a continuing journey that will bring about fresh and sustainable change.

I am now in the process of doing an AA 12 Step Inventory- To look at my resentments and , as any good businessman, I will be working to remove that which profits no one, that which I clearly " cannot sell."

I have had a lot of support, wisdom, strong and motivating advice from a number of dedicated fellow Church Members. I, following the wise advice of my Pastor, John Slye, chose AND decided to set up an 18 Month Program for My self- the 18 Month Prime Directive- With Goals and Action responses for EACH of Those 18 Months. I also spend time reviewing and adjusting this program over the course of EACH of these months. I am still a sinful man, my feet are still most definitely clay but I will confess that OVERALL I think more clearly, make better choices and am living a life that I enjoy more and more!

Change requires a desire, an attitude a commitment to act, a plan of action and getting into action doing what you said that you desire to do!

The 18 Month Prime Directive Program, formally, comes to an end on April 30Th. I am grateful to God and to numerous PEOPLE that have worked with me to" create" a me that I, on most days, actually enjoy being .


- Johnny -