Deferring Consequences

      I am a consumer of Mental Health Services. The services that I use are provided by the Fairfax County Mental Health System. I note that I, in part, need these services due to bad decisions I've made in my life. Part of what I live with is that I MUST live with, even now, the consequences of those past choices. I also must discipline myself to make better choices today even if they are difficult , painful and, even, at present, choices that I do not want to make, in order to gain the option of a better today and tomorrow!

  It sorely irks me that some individuals are shielded mightily from the consequences of their actions. They are allowed to use Their illness, the Mental Health system and The Americans with Disability Act itself to say, " No matter what I do, Suck it up because you have no choice to accept it."

 There are, as I see it, 3 categories of people in the Public Mental Health System. The first are those who have no ability to make choices and those who are just unable to control their actions. It would be criminal and brutal to expect them to be accountable and it is just and commendable that such people be shielded to the extent that it is possible to do so. There are those who have had struggles some due biochemistry, some due to trauma and others due to a combination of both. While it may be VERY difficult for them to make tough decisions that may be connected to unpleasant consequences, They are able and capable of doing so and are capable of doing so. The third category consists of those who are able to argue successfully that, " My actions are me. You need to accept them as you accept me.". People in this grouping are given support that allows them to sustain this position.

  What I find interesting is that you hear people in Category 3 use what I call the" Excuses of The Militantly Anti- Social" such as " You don't know me, You don't know my life" or " If you choose to follow rules, That's on you" or other ways of telling us that " That DOES! NOT! apply to me!". I've brought this us before and I'm obviously returning to it NOW. I do so because those who are allowed to escape the responsibility for their poor choices diminish the choices and life quality of others and are allowed to get away with it when they do not need to be allowed to get away with their actions.

Years ago, I was beaten by someone who told me that he was going to kill me. This person had once been a close friend of mine. I tried to help him  deal with some tough issues- but he seemed to want to avoid the tough choices. I had him prosecuted and watched in horror as he was given a sentence of merely a few days that was immediately suspended. I wanted to protest but was warned not to do so.

 He and I both wound up in The Mental Health System, One reason I entered it was to deal with my responses to the beating that I received from this person. He and I wound up in some of the same places as I did and I stated that I was not comfortable with that. I was told that I was free to "stay or go", that I could do as I saw fit but I was not to interfere with his services or ask that the providers treat him any way other than how they saw fit. It was even suggested that if I found that an unacceptable explanation then this showed that I needed very severe help and they suggested that this is something I need to work on.

 Good Mental Health practices require that clients/ patients consumers feel as secure as possible where they are and feel safe and secure in the settings where they are receiving serious- If some are absolved from responsibility and told that they will be guarded against the consequences of their actions, Then this denies the qualities of safe places to be treated to the ones they decide to prey upon.

 This also puts these consumers in a position where they may decide to not access services and resources due to not wanting to subject themselves to bullies and predators who are choosing to treat other poorly and to be blunt mean spiritedly. We know that budgets are tight and that people are asked to be as understanding, kind, fore bearing and as bighearted as possible, This work well for those who cannot control their behavior and do not behave in ways that are intensely disruptive,, troubling and place others at risk. This also works well for those who can control their behaviors and do so well and appropriately. There is something heroic about a man or a woman, a youth or even a child who struggles hard to do what is appropriate and proper and does so any way.

  Those who cannot control their behaviors and behave in offensive, out-of -control highly disruptive and endangering ways wind up in either institutions or prisons or in a setting which allows them a restricted access to the general society. This is sad but necessary. I believe that for those with mental health issues, this placement should Never be in a prison. Those who can control their behavior and serve as societal nuisances, problem causes or public menaces need to be told that they will find themselves losing their freedom. It is wrong for them to be allowed to run amok while others are held tightly accountable for what they decided to do and do not do.

  To bring this home, A few years ago, after having been homeless for 6 months, I became a part of a 3 person apartment in Reston, Va. This was not a good setting but it was an improvement over where I had been and I needed to make due with it at that time. I heard a young man tell the bus driver, who he was friendly with that he'd be in court soon answering a charge of assaulting his girlfiend, He was not worriedeabout it- He said that he'd  siomply tell the judge of his mental health issues and they'd go lightly on him. He seemed to be remembering how he'd been treated in past times. He even told the driver, " Sure, I knew not to hit my girlfriend, but why should I care, They won't punish me for it."

 It is peopler such as this young man and my assaiailant who need to be held FULLY accountable for how they behave and need to be told that they can't get away with any and every behavior they choose to execute at and given moment. People pay prices for bad choices and so must they!