Today, Memories of a father who mocked me beat me severely and unncessarily, who denied me oftem and told me that nothing about me was loveable , likable and worth vauing.
On this Sunday, I was given a Father's Day present by My Pastor's daughter - A VERY ! attractive looking tie! The rest of this day was rather lamentable.
What I want is a break through. I yearn for a path out. What would really help me would be a team of people who can show me how to position myself to find a job that will pay well , that I will excel in and that will be a marvelous fit, a shop that will prove to be both empowering and healing.
My mid- afternoon tells movingly what I too often have to endure. I did not want to face a long Father's Day evening in the forced company of me, myself and I with out a treat. I decided to get a treat I can afford, A Mc D's Ice Cream Cone.Right after buying my Cone, A man who I'd do ANYTHING to avoid walked in a man who reeks of dirt and from soiling himself with human wastes. It often angers me that my abilty to enjoy my food is ruined by his totally intolerableness. My life would be much better if that was seldom an encounter I need to cope with.
I also cut loose, perhaps,permanently, a friend who is too stubborn to accept my boundaries and who uses my background against me. I hate that any of this is true of my life. I wish so ardently that none of this be so.
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