The Desire for Tradition on THIS Thanksgiving Day!

 It doesn't usually strike me as bluntly as this!!! As I type this I'm very much reminded that while this will be a GREAT Thanksgiving day and while I an a blessed man, this day, to me, is a bit off-target, is just not as I would have it be! As I am a 56 year old- Today, I hate typing this, Conservative Republican rather TRADITIONAL  American, I will admit that today is not Thanksgiving as I wish it to be for me!

  I was reminded of this as I saw that a friend on Facebook changed his status YESTERDAY to in a relationship. I do celebrate with him his blessing- his improved fortune. Yet, It reminds me that I do believe that this should also be true of me- that TODAY, I want to be a family man, a husband or, at very least, I want to be in a secure and growing relationship. Being a very disconnected- as I see it today- and unmarried man, is just not my status as I desire it to be today! This, like Christmas is a Family Holiday!!!! I have loving Church friends and I will participate in a Church Potluck at a home of a couple with Children, I do realize that this is an event set up for those not connected and rather with out. This Thanksgiving will be the FIRST one since 2005 that I will be with other people! Yes, This is a great improvement!  However, It is not a Christmas with a wife and children or with a significant other and her family or even just a cozy Thanksgiving with a significant others. It is a better day- absolutely- but on a grading scale it is an 80- good and most certainly passing but just not...

 Yesterday, for entertainment and to escape my awareness, for a short while, of what I have typed above, I rented a Great Movie from A Red Box Location at a Nearby Shoppers- Grownups- a great movie that I thoroughly enjoyed.. I am going to be a part of a Pot Luck celebration Of Thanksgiving in a few Hours in Springfield, Virginia and I was up early to make sure I returned the movie in plenty of time. I really try to avoid any possibility of late fees whenever possible.

 I ,then, stopped off at The local Mickey D's for coffee. Over the last 2 weeks, I've made a conscious effort to greatly reduce my coffee consumption and getting a cup of coffee from a restaurant makes it more likely that I will just have one cup. There is a 24 hour Diner in the same block- but that means sitting down and I was on the move and there would be a greater likelihood that I would permit myself a second cup.

 I admit, I did go into the Mc Donald's a bit grudgingly. A part of me wished that Mc Donald's was closed for the Holiday as would have been true up to a few years ago. I could say a lot of what bothered me about the McDonald's setting today but lets say it was, to me, a 180 degrees away from any of my notions of a Traditional Thanksgiving. !

 So, As I can't control people, place and things, truly nothing save myself, What do I with all of this? I guess I thank God for what I have rather than what I want! I also tell myself that If I want a Traditional Thanksgiving in 2011 and beyond, The person I see in the mirror needs to work harder, better, smarter and wiser to make that a possibility!

Yet, It will be hard today not to be a bit melancholy for a Thanksgiving that is just not truly as I wanna have it be. So, I accept and celebrate life on life's turns and today as it simply shall unfold! Yet, In my way of thinking it seems,My Thanksgiving 2010 is a Brian Wilson Thanksgiving, "Wouldn't it be nice... ? " !!!!!!

PS . - I just heard from a woman who spend the first part of this year telling me that she wanted to start a new life with a fresh start --- with me!---- a short while ago. She  TODAY told me that she has returned to her Old boy friend who she will be with FOREVER! She also told me that I would never hear from her again and she thanked me for understanding.

For the record, she, in February , told a friend that she found me to be really handsome. She encouraged this friend to tell me she wanted to get to know me! Oh Well!

I STILL believe that This Thanksgiving is going to be a good and blessed day! I , in all honestly MUST confess That I believe, at the same time that THIS day is going to be SAND PAPER rough to get through!

- Johnny -