What sane person would insist on this?

What sane person would insist on fighting this battle? Can you imagine feeling pleased and victorious because someone tells you that your worst behaviors,your unacceptable attitudes and most offensive habits are fine . whole acceptable, "ALL GOOD" and worthy of defending and supporting?

 I think most people who are thinking clearly and logically might ask, " Would you choose to ever behave,engage in the same habits and use the same vocabulary that I routinely use?"  If that person says, " Well, No I wouldn't but that is just how I am! It works for you but I would prefer to not live this way." " Why not? If you think it is great for me to be this way and you honor me for how I am, Then why isn't my way " all good" for you to roll with." " We3 are different people. I do not judge you but it just isn't me?!!!".

If the person who is told that his/her rough and hard to deal with behaviors are exactly right for them asked me to observe this whole conversation and tell them my opinion of what I see going on, I would not be very kind to the "Understanding, Accepting and Big Hearted person who was providing "support" to him or her!

I would say, bluntly, " I'd be very angry and hurt if I had been spoken to and treated as you just have been!". " Why- Sue/Edwin seem to care about me!". " I'm sorry, That is not how I saw it! You were obnoxiously and offensively told that you are just not as good as he/ she is!" I'd then say " At best, They are pitying you, They are telling you that you are far less than they are and they understand that while what you do is really unacceptable and pretty unattractive and dreadful that it is acceptable because you are not able to do any better or become any better!"

We often treat the long term unemployed,  the homeless, those who seem to reek from bad or non-existent personal hygiene,  the badly educate and those who act out at any time and seem willing to menace any one who challenges them for doing so as pets or as a sub-species. In Tech Talk as -Human Being  MINUS 1.0!

We help no one, we, in effect, are the worst enemies imaginable when we tell people that no matter how you live, how you behave and matter what you do and what you say that you are fine exactly as you are!!! No one has the right to ever tell you any different." The idea that someone needs to improve, behaves unacceptably, needs to improve the way they speak and the words they choose to say are all based on a simple but incredibly noble idea- that this person is capable of progressing beyond  what they are capable of right now. They can be better educated, they can be shown ways that work better and will make it easier and more likely that they will become more respected and taken more seriously. They tell them anything else is simply evil, heartless and a true and pure act inspired by prejudice and bigotry!

I didn't like being told this years ago but I needed to hear, " Johnny, You are a mess. You drive people away and really offend them by the way you dress, the way you maintain yourself and by the attitudes that you show. You are a great guy at times but if you keep acting the way you do and living as you live, You are going to live a very lonely, miserable and unhappy life!" I hated it, at the time. It angered me and led me to attempt to offend them in turn, "Good and caring people - True Friends -would never talk to me in this manner !".  I thank God today that they didn't buy into it, that they considered the source- at THAT TIME- I truly cringe at just how much of a mess I TRULY was then- and loved me ENOUGH to see what my potential was and dared me to allow myself to become what they saw I could turn into in my future!

There is an old saying,"God loves you exactly as you are but He loves you far too much to want you top stay that way!". The Bigotry of FAR TOO Low and Soft expectations is an act of callous dismissal and indifference not an act of love!

- Johnny -